Hospice Humor is No Joke

[Frances Shani Parker]

Humor has a lot do do with the kinds of interactions my patients and I share. My terminally ill patients are often funny, not only with me, but with others with whom they have contact. A very engaging patient remembered many hilarious stories about her life. Some days she’d just reminisce and have us both cracking up, especially when she talked about the bear chasing her in circles around her house. A male patient and his roommates teased one another so much, it was unlimited laughter every time I visited. Did I mention the two ladies having a pretend fight from their wheelchairs? Oh, and the bedside birthday party with a menu of fried chicken livers, red velvet cake, and ice cream was another winner!

A study at Kent State University USA on hospice and humor was reported in “The American Journal of Hospice & Palliative Care.” Conclusions revealed that humor was present in 85 percent of 132 observed nurse-based hospice visits. The real clincher is that hospice patients initiated humor 70 percent of the time, regardless of the hospice setting. Reflecting my own hospice experiences, this study confirms that many of the terminally ill continue to maintain a comic state of mind. And that’s no joke!

What’s your funny hospice story?

Frances Shani Parker, Author
"Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes”
“Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog”

[Kelly Keller]

Thanks for this. The timing of this post is ironic for me. I recently visited a patient in a nursing home who was new to our hospice, but not to the facility. Our hospice aid remembered in team that she used to tell a lot of jokes in the past - as she was the roommate of a former patient of ours. I had a joke book for my first visit and said "I heard you like jokes" she gruffly said "No..." and I said, "Oh, darn, I brought a joke book with me. Mind if I try a few?" She said "Sure" and chuckled a great deal at the jokes, even remarking "How do people come up with all these?" After that, she started telling me about herself and her background in a very casual, natural way. Just then, her daughter entered the room. The patient stopped talking immediately. I introduced myself and showed her the book we'd been reading jokes from. I read from her cues that she prefer to be alone with her mother, and excused myself. Do you know the next day, the daughter complained to the social worker about my coming in with jokes? She couldn't understand how someone visiting her mom and telling jokes could be beneficial to her mother. It put it into perspective to me how sometimes the greatest gift a volunteer brings is the absence of the doom and gloom sadness that family members often have around the idea of a terminal diagnosis. Whereas a family member is still struggling seeing past the terminal diagnosis, we don't see a person who is dying, but a person who is living the last of their weeks, months or years. Thanks for this post, Francis!

[Frances Shani Parker]

Kelly, thanks for sharing that very interesting story and your perspective on it.

Frances